Eating IN

Very soon you all are likely to realize that I am dealing with a ‘lot’ of beef these days! It’s a consignment thing, when I get beef…I get loads of it! A part of me wishes I could have access to the real thing, which is banned in India, so much for secular democracy! I want to eat a cow, now if that offends anybody then they are most welcome to not partake in the meal I prepare, they are welcome to avoid my home and kitchen and never speak my name again! All fine by me but that still doesn’t solve the problem! There are days I want just 1 kilo of real veal …the melt in the mouth stuff and then I just have to wait for my next trip abroad or pay through every orifice of my body for it in a fancy 5 star hotel! In any case India has a fixation with hotels, whatever they cook …goes! We have few and far between A- class kitchens in this country and that’s a reality people like me just have to live with. I would probably only spend in an ITC or Oberoi’s property, I know how these guys work (first hand), I know they source from the best of purveyors and I know they employ the best of talent. So that makes my meal half good already. For me the flip side is that I am also a big fan of thrift so I just don’t do value meals anymore, I just wait longer and choose better … and hope we have a good meal ahead of us! No ordering cheap grub from obscure neighbourhood joints unless you happen to live around iconic street/budget food joints. I would love to live across from Karim’s, even now, despite the price hike and the commercial flavour in the food.

So I say do better, yummier, fancier meals at home and splurge on quality meals when you eat out. One perfect way of making a budget for exotic ingredients are the above mentioned cut backs. The savings from your restriction on budget, average chow is your budget for some fine, quality foods, produce and preserves. Say you spend Rs.1000 on a meal for 4 from the average Tandoori joint next door, I say wait! Keep that 1000 for 1 kilo prime lamb ribs (just ask your butcher for single ‘chaamp’), which is …ok here’s a better break up, pricing is an average, in Rs., as of July 2010 –

Main Course:
1 kg mutton champ (14 + pcs) 250
1 kikkoman soy sauce 99
10 garlic pods 25
1 tbsp honey 10
2 tsp coarse ground black pepper 25
1 tsp salt (Kikkoman has lovely soy saltiness so be careful!) 2
250 gms breadcrumbs 20
2 eggs 10
Salt/pepper seasoning for the crumbs 5
Oil to fry 50

Essential:
1 meat mallet 199

Sides:
Bag of 4 bread rolls 30
Bag of 500 gms French fries 50
(bake ‘em, arrange them in a Pyrex dish, spray oil, use any kind of spray bottle, clean well and use for oil. Bake on 250 till done, 4-5 mins usually)

Lettuce 50

Beverage:
2 lt. Coke 60

Dessert:
1 lt vanilla ice cream 100
(Amul is usually 1+1)
2 Mangoes 20

TOTAL: 1005

(Hey you would have paid for parking, given tips, all that!!)

So there I spent your 1000 bucks, created an opportunity for you to hone your cooking skills, be thrifty, spend quality time with the family over a meal and movie Saturday night! Oh ya, I also got you a mallet to add to your kitchen tools just in case you don’t have one. Locally in Gurgaon you get them at the Lifestyle store in DT Mall, I have linked listing to an Amazon.com page, so help yourselves.

Wash the chops under running water, pat dry with a kitchen towel. Keep a few sets of budget kitchen towels and use the hell out of them. Keep the meat ones separate if you can or junk them after use if you got a good deal on them! Put each chop on a cutting board and gently beat the meaty side with the mallet. There are two sides on a mallet, one with a large surface area to beat down and the other with a smaller one. For lamb chops use the smaller spokes side. Flatten each one, not through and through, just a bit to soften and loosen up the meat. I keep two cutting boards, one for meats and one for veggies and everything else. I learnt that from my mother in laws kitchen; makes complete sense in terms of hygiene.

Marinate the chops in the soy, honey, pepper, salt and garlic. I always crush the garlic with the flat side of my knife, I got me a cool garlic press but I believe Anthony Bourdain hates them, so from a chef’s perspective, that tool is officially shunned! It makes an excellent prop when I style food, so am still happy with it! You have to peel the damn garlic either way, so crush-with-knife it is. Mix the marinade in a bowl, pour over the chops and please please use your hands to mix the meat and marinade. Seriously, the heat from your hands and the mixing motion with work the marinade in, so use those hands. Marinate in the fridge for 4-6 hours, if you can, they will cook faster.

Beat the eggs lightly; put the crumbs in a flat plate, season with salt and pepper. Best way to check the seasoning is taste the crumbs, they are cooked … you can put them in your mouth! Now dunk each chop in the egg then flatten on the crumbs and coat both sides well. Sometimes if the chops are too thick, I add 2-3 tbsp of cornflour to make the crumb coating less crumby and smoother. Cooks slower that way and when the chops are thick, they need to cook slower! Prepare all the chops before you start frying. Heat oil in a non stick pan, I don’t use non stick pans to use less oil; I just like them for the non stickiness. So I put about quarter inch of oil, enough to half cover the chop. Heat the oil well, don’t let it smoke, throw in a few crumbs to see if they sizzle, if they do, add a chop or two and if they sizzle too, then add as many as your pan can fit. Now is when you put the fries in the oven. Back to the chops, do each side of well, so you only turn the chops once, the less you turn the less chance of the crumb top falling apart. Turn the chops, lightly brown on both sides, check the fries, wash the lettuce very well and just tear it up in a pretty bowl, better still get one of the younger kids to do it….get someone else to lay the table! Heat the bread rolls before the oven cools. Serve the meal together, the chops, the rolls, the fries and drinks for everyone! For dessert I planned mangoes and ice cream because its mango season right now, so make the most of it! You however have a bit more than 100 bucks to plan your dessert (that’s Indian rupees), you can do a coffee pudding. How about I share that tomorrow?!